5 Things to Consider When Visiting a Newborn!
Your loved one just brought home a baby! Your so excited to meet the baby and to congratulate the new parents. Before you head to the see them there are few things you’ll want to keep in mind.
Be extremely considerate of germs. When you have a new baby all you want to do is keep your little one from getting sick. For a baby even the smallest infection can be a big deal. Some ways you can help are by:
Washing your hands when you arrive. Bonus points if you wash your hands before being asked.
Not kissing the baby.
Not visiting if you feel sick or are sick. Always err on the side of caution.
Leaving your children at home. In the beginning it may be helpful to leave your children at home when visiting unless your loved ones say to bring them.
Help is always welcome! Ask your loved one what you can do to help. Help is always nice but it is even better when it is with things they need help with instead of what we think they need. I’ll leave a few things that may be helpful to ask.
Would you like me to pick up some groceries before heading over? Ask for a grocery list.
Would you like me to hold the baby while you take a nap or shower?
If they have older children you can offer to entertain them or take them for a few hours.
If they have a dog you can offer to walk the dog.
You’re loved ones may not be up to visitors! Always call and ask!! If they tell you they aren’t up for visitors yet don’t get offended. They likely need a few days to get acquainted and would welcome visitors in a couple days. Let them know that you are available if they need anything and that you’ll check back in a week or so. This way they know that you are only a phone call away if they need anything. Another thing to consider is that they’ll likely be overwhelmed with visitors and family in the first few days/week. Check back in with them in a few weeks when things have settled down and they’ll likely welcome the opportunity to have you visit and the help.
Bring a Meal or a Gift Card! If you’re coming for a visit brings some food! New parents are so busy find their “new normal” that they are living off convenience and fast foods. They would be overjoyed to sit down and have a balanced meal. If you aren’t much of a cook then you could always grab dinner from somewhere and bring it or bring a gift card to a restaurant in the area. *Bonus points if they deliver!
Ask Thoughtful Questions. These parents are learning about their new baby and trying to find the perfect balance. They are simply doing the best they can! The questions that we tend to ask generally come from a genuine place but they can be hurtful to new parents who are trying their hardest to figure this parenting thing out. I’ll share some examples of the questions i’m talking about and then a question/statement that could be said instead.
Are you breastfeeding?
Instead say something like “He looks so happy and healthy!”
Did you have an epidural, c-section, no medication, etc?
Ask if they would like to talk about their labor and delivery experience or simply the birth. It’s important to respect their story if they choose to share it and their answer if they choose not to talk about it. They may not be ready to talk about it yet.
Is the baby sleeping through the night?
I remember I was so tired when my child was a newborn. If you would like to take a nap i’d be happy to hold her.
You’re loved ones understand that meeting their child is exciting to their family and friends. They totally understand that while you are happy for them you are there to meet the baby. Please take the time to ask them how they are doing! They just welcomed a new baby into their family and are adjusting to and experiencing life with a new born and it is tough. They are learning new things everyday and adjusting to be the best parents they can be all while trying to maintain their own identities. This can bring up lots of feelings and questions and concerns and they would likely welcome the opportunity to talk through some of these things with the people who mean the most to them.